When you compile a guest list as you plan wedding invitations, remember that the final list is usually an amalgam of several smaller lists: those of the bride and groom, as well as both sets of parents. You’ll have even more lists to consider if the parents are divorced and remarried. Bear a few bits of wedding advice in mind while you make your decisions. When the bride's family pays for the wedding, custom dictates that they are allowed more guests than the groom’s family. Conversely, if the groom’s parents are paying, they can invite more. You should also consider whether one side has a much larger family. If the guest list grows too lengthy, tell your parents in a calm, gentle manner to limit their choices to people you know personally.

Once you’ve collected everyone’s input, edit down their suggestions. Organize the names into categories, such as immediate family, distant relatives, and friends you must invite. Some people create A- and B-lists. They have backup names from the B-list ready to fill in if some people from the A-list can’t make the wedding. If you do this, however, be sure to mail any B-list invitations at least three weeks before the wedding to avoid seeming rude.